


You Feel Like Home

by thylabucky



Category: Metal Gear
Genre: Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Let me have this ok, M/M, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Past BBKaz - Freeform, because i live for that shit, fight me you cowards, fluff so soft it's almost ooc, it's like kind of implied if you squint real hard, kaz is gayer than fandom thinks, kaz? happy? more likely than you think, past mkaz, porn without plot? no, the fandom gave me only sad shit and angst so i made my own hardcore fluff, vemon calls kaz pretty so many times because hes GAY, vemon cries and needs hugs, welcome to FLUFF with no plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-01
Updated: 2018-09-01
Packaged: 2019-07-05 04:45:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15856479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thylabucky/pseuds/thylabucky
Summary: Sometimes even Diamond Dogs cry.





	You Feel Like Home

**Author's Note:**

> Henlo twinks!!!!! Welcome to fluffvile, population me. This is my first time actually posting any of my work like...anywhere? If you could go easy on a gay that would be gr8.
> 
> Also, I listened to Love Deterrence while I wrote this if you'd like some background music recommendations.

"You feel like home, Kaz."

The gruff, sleep deprived voice sitting at the edge of his bed spoke; sounding as raw and genuine as the day he came to his office, weak from crying, and begged Kaz to hold him until the voices stopped.

Kaz stopped working on his papers, pausing silently before he looked back at V with gentle eyes. Vemon took the look he gave as an okay, and moved in closer, bridging the space between them. He took the back of Kaz's neck with his flesh hand and pulled his forehead on his, feeling his soft blonde hair between his fingers. He felt like oxygen, every second close to him was like coming up for air inside suffocating darkness. Kaz gently took Vemon's hand, feeling him tremble under his touch. He's been through too much. They've done too much to him.

"It's alright," Kaz said back to him, barely above a whisper, "you can let it out."

Vemon just nodded, eyes tight and grip even tighter. Kaz couldn't tell what brought this on so suddenly, but he didn't need to know. He felt his presence at his back for hours, wordlessly watching him with something heavy on his shoulders. It wasn't until now the man spoke, just before melting under his touch.

"Nothing makes sense- everything, it's just...bits and pieces. But you..." he shuddered out between hard breaths, "you make everything...make sense again."

Kaz took V's face in his hand, watching his eyes open up. He didn't say anything, only brushing tears off his cheek with his thumb, watching Snake under him. He crumpled into a quiet sob, melting into the crook of Kaz's neck. Kaz pulled his arm around him, pressing soft kisses into the side of his head. He smelled like sweat and sand, mixed with regulation soap. In other words, he smelled like home to Kaz.

It took him a moment, but after Kaz began rubbing gentle circles into his back, the sobbing began to lessen. It was replaced with a softer pulse and even softer breath.

"Kaz?" Vemon spoke into the dead silence, arms wrapped around him.

"Yeah, boss?"

"Thank you," he spoke tenderly. Tender enough to melt Kazuhira's heart. The blonde gently pressed a kiss into Vemon's cheek, hand in his hair again.

"Have I mentioned lately how much I love your hair like this?" Kaz spoke after a few moments, still running his hands through the man's soft hair. He felt Vemon chuckle under him. It was godly.

"Once or twice," Snake teased back, smile pressed onto Kaz's neck.

With that, Kaz moved to look up at the man over him, the both of them taking the moment to look over each other. Neither of them looked pretty, both looking to each other with sleep-deprived eyes and pale skin. But they were both accustom to that by now.

"You look like ass," Vemon said with a soft tease despite. Only one person was allowed to mother hen Kaz, and that was the boss. It didn't help that he was so pretty, smiling at Kaz as he scolded him, "how long has it been since you've actually slept?"

Of course, he had to ask that. See, there was a strict policy around mother base. What the boss doesn't know won't hurt him. So what if Miller overworks? Somebody around here has to while the boss is gone. Now, don't let Vemon hear that, but it's true. Kaz faltered for a second, immediately averting Vemon's eyes. Just because he could hen over him like this didn't mean Kaz had to like it.

"Well, you know, when you're gone on missions," he started, glancing over for just a second to see a scowl on the one-eyed man. Oh, boy.

"I have paperwork that piles up, volunteers to work with, and you to worry about! XO's don't get the luxury of sleep!" He continued defensively. And he'd planned to continue on more, before Vemon put a finger to his lips, lightly shushing him. It actually made Kaz pout.

"Well, my XO does. Come on," V placed a kiss to his lips, quick and sweet, before starting to help Kaz up.

"Hey!" Kaz protested, "I still have all this to finish," he was gently pulled up, his jacket being slid off by careful fingers, "if I don't have all of this done by next week our deal with our last client will fall through!" He kept on, Vemon making a face as he fiddled with the buttons on Kaz's uniform. Kaz didn't say a word, much too prideful to admit how much he loved watching Vemon undress him.

"Are you even listening to me?" he said as Vemon loosened his tie and unbuttoned his undershirt. He opened his mouth to continue when the taller man said nothing, only to be quickly interrupted by a group of soft kisses placed on just the right parts of his neck and collarbone. There was nothing like the rough feeling of Vemon's beard across his neck and chin. Under it, he quickly shut up, melting like putty. Vemon smirked at a job well done.

"Not fair," Kaz said when the man pulled away from his neck, looking down at him. He slung his arm onto Vemon's shoulder, causing Vemon to pull him in closer by the waist. As a kid, Kaz had always dreamt of a lover like in the movies. One that sweeps you up off your feet, pulls you in for a kiss that takes your breath away. Somehow, he'd found it in the strangest of places, in the toughest of men. Vemon, his hands under his shirt and now touching his pink skin, pulled the shorter man in for one of those kisses. Breathtaking and addictive. He put his hand in Vemon's hair, not wanting the moment to end. But it did, and it ended with the horned man pressed against him shirking Kaz's button up gently onto the ground, leaving only his undershirt and pants behind. He pulled away and began working at his belt. Kaz kept his arm on his shoulder, partially to maintain their closeness, partially so he didn't fall over.

"My, my, and you haven't even bought me dinner," Kaz teased him. He felt rarely light, and it carried in every part of him. Vemon just smirked, shaking his head. At the expense of falling over and looking like an idiot, Kaz leaned into Vemon, as close as he could, with that light smirk. "You know, there are other kinds of work we could be doing," he said in a low, suggestive tone. Vemon just rolled his eyes and kept undressing him as gently as he could.

"Do you mind?" Vemon spoke softly, gesturing to his glasses. Kaz paused for a moment, in the dimly lit room. He nodded slowly. He'd seen them. He knows how bad they are. With the same kind of gentle touch he'd come to expect from him, he took off his sunglasses. Kaz held his eyes tight for a moment before slowly adjusting to the room, opening his eyes to see a little blurrier, but lighter Snake in front of him. He felt oddly vulnerable in a way he didn't expect.

It was as if the man sensed it almost instantly. He paused in his worry to take Kaz's cheek, pressing a kiss to his forehead, down to his cheek. It made Kaz blush. After, Kaz said nothing, letting Vemon pull off his undershirt next. Vemon took the moment to run his hand down from Kaz's cheek to his neck, searching his body. He held him up with the robotic one, not noticing the way Kaz watched him. There was confusion in his eyes, waiting for the rough, calloused man to voice what was going through his mind as he scanned every inch of Kaz's bare skin. As Kaz was about to ask, V began to lay kisses all over him, all over the scars he'd gained from these long years. Kaz closed his eyes tight, trying to hold back that soft pounding he felt in his chest, all while keeping a tight grip on Vemon's neck. Finally, Vemon kissed his cheek, smiling down at him as he pulled him in, pressing him against his body. Kaz opened his eyes again, seeing that blue eye shine down at him in the dim lighting.

"You're beautiful," V spoke as if he was an angel looking at God's creation. Fuck, he couldn't start crying. Not now. Don't be that soft, Miller.

A self-proclaimed demon held him against him so tenderly, their heartbeats melting together as Kaz reached to take Vemon's cheek. His hellhound looked like an angel in this lighting. And no amount of sin could change that.

Of course, then came the waterworks.

Vemon wiped away his stray tears, suddenly looking concerned. "You okay?"

Kaz smiled through his wet cheeks, caressing the man's face. "You remember what you told me when you came back?"

Vemon watched him silently, waiting for him to continue.

"You're an angel to me, Snake," Kaz said, looking up at him intently. "Nothing will change that."

V seemed taken aback. He looked at Kaz with those heavy eyes, those eyes that belonged to him and only him. It took a moment before he saw tears drip down the rough man's cheeks as well. Kaz softly chuckled, brushing them aside.

"I think we've gotten soft in our old age," he said, watching Vemon close his eyes tightly and lean into his touch. Vemon said nothing, but once again, he didn't need to. The old dogs had been through too much together, and no matter the circumstances, that meant they knew each other, even in death. V just kissed the palm of Kaz's hand, taking it with his own and squeezing it. Kaz squeezed it back. He leaned into Vemon and pressed a kiss to his lips before pulling away with a soft smile. Vemon smiled back at Kaz, still holding his cheek like it was a rose.

After a second of finally pulling his belt off, Vemon helped Kaz move to the bed in the next room, leaving his discarded clothes in his office and not caring if someone found them. He laid Kaz on the sheets like he was gold, kissing his hand like the gentleman he was. Kaz really, really hated how easily he blushed around him. Finally, the softer man took off his work pants and prosthetic, leaving him in just boxers beneath him. Kaz couldn't help but watch him from his place on the bed, smirking lightly. He teased him by gently pressing a foot to his chest, hand behind his head.

"Your turn," he spoke to the strong man above him, gesturing for him to come to him with a move of his chin.  
Luckily, Kaz had it much easier. V was in just a jacket and some cargo pants, which was easy enough, even for him. He sat up as Vemon drew closer, straddling the man below him. It felt way too good.

First, his jacket was discarded. Underneath it revealing the palest, most sensitive parts of the soldier's skin. Kaz couldn't help but smirk, pulling V closer with the fabric of his shirt and starting to kiss into his neck. He ran his hand under the shirt as he kissed ard enough to leave marks, feeling Vemon shudder under him. It felt good knowing Kaz still had this kind of power over him. After a moment, Kaz quickly discarded the shirt, pulling away as he moved onto the buttons of his pants. He saw V looking at him with stars in his eyes, dazed and intoxicated. It only made the blonde feel even more smug. 

After a moment, Kaz gestured to Vemon's pants, letting him take a moment to pull them down himself. Finally, they were both equal. In the quiet, Kaz took a moment to run his hand across Vemon's chest. There were scars and fresh bruises, too many to count or recall. He gently ran his hand across a few of them, V's darker skin in stark contrast to Kaz's pale white.

He finally looked up to see Vemon watching him with heavy eyes, looking for something in Kaz's expression. Kaz took his cheek again, smiling tenderly.

"You worry me," he started, looking over the scars again. "You know that?"

Vemon looked away.

"I..." Kaz trailed off before sighing and looking away. "I know I'm harsh...I-I know I'm too hard on you sometimes, but..." he paused again. After a second, he looked back, gaze firm as he gently moved V's cheek to look at him. "I can't lose you again. I can't," Kaz tried to hide the crack in his voice, but it was damn near impossible with those blue eyes looking back at him like that. They were remorseful and kind. Like he never wanted to hear Kaz sound like that again.

"I know," Vemon said, moving to grasp Kaz's hand, squeezing it tight. It was all he could do, all he could say. Kaz knew it, but he still felt his chest tighten. "I'll be more careful, I promise."

Kaz nodded at that, chest still tight and lump still gripping his throat. "Good," he responded as best he could, pushing everything out of the way to do so. A few moments passed, ones that felt like hours, as Vemon held Kaz and waited for that fear to gently dissipate into the warm air between them. Kaz just closed his eyes and ran his thumb over Vemon's hands, leaning into him and feeling their breath mingling. Like being put on an oxygen tank after those weeks of torture, he breathed the moment in. Eventually, the aching subsided.

He opened his eyes again and drank in the presence in front of him. Jesus, he was glorious. It had been ages and he still could spend all day looking at him. If there was one thing his mom taught him, it was never to dismiss the long-forgotten art of natural human beauty. And God did Vemon have a lot of it.

Kaz closed his eyes again for a moment, leaning against V's forehead. "Fuck, you're hot," he finally let out in a light chuckle, shaking his head with that wry smirk. Kaz could feel the heat rush to Vemon's face as he chuckled, falling into Miller's shoulder. Kaz kept that smirk.

"Was that really the first thing you could think to say after all that?" V said into his shoulder, still shaking his head. Kaz had a hand in his hair, curling it between his fingers.

"Maybe," he smiled playfully. Vemon just shook his head, finally looking up at Kaz with that lazy smile. There was a light pause as V watched him, his eyes eventually drifting down to his lips. Kaz's expression faded as he did, watching him. He just stared at them, eye swirling like he was thinking of something. It made Kaz chuckle.

"Here, let me help," Kaz said, letting his hand drift down to V's neck as he pulled him forward, pressing their lips together for a deep kiss. It took Vemon by surprise for just a second before his hands came to grip onto Kaz, pulling him as close as he could to him.

The two melted effortlessly into the rhythm, V holding Kaz under him with those calloused hands. Rough and gentle, the two things that made Kaz turn into mush in V's hands. Warmth turned to heat as the seconds passed. He'd missed him, missed this. Vemon kissed down his neck, undoubtedly leaving marks, but Kaz didn't care. He gripped onto V's hair, a small noise reaching his throat. V went to kiss it, gentle mixing with the rough. It felt perfect, like everything he'd been searching for in all those one-night stands. He absorbed every blissful moment, wishing beyond hope that he could burn this moment into memory.

But eventually, Vemon pulled back, breath a little heavier, but his eyes much softer. V couldn't help but smirk at the now bright pink man under his grip. Kaz just shook his head, chest heavy as he pushed back some of Vemon's hair.

"Show off," Kaz said, glancing down at the red marks on his neck and chest. V just smirked and shrugged, leaning in to give Kaz another soft kiss. Kaz melted into it, eyes still closed when Vemon pulled away. They blinked open once he felt V's hot breath leave him, watching Kaz with soft eyes. Kaz smiled back at him for a moment, before letting out a yawn. Vemon gave him a bit of a smug look as he did, making Kaz roll his eyes.

After a hot second, V pulled Kaz up in the way he'd adjusted to Vemon always handling him. Like he was precious cargo, something that kept him from drifting away in a storm. But not like the other men around the base who carried him like a china doll, as if he was ready to shatter at any moment. No, Vemon knew when to let Kaz handle things and when Kaz wanted him. And tonight? Kaz needed him. Needed him like he never thought he'd want for another person before.

With a tender touch, Vemon pulled him towards the pillows, letting Kaz adjust once he was there. Vemon took the time to make it as dark as possible in the room, shutting out any light. Which was saying something, considering the room had barely a spec of light to begin with. But it was all too endearing, watching V fuss over his comfort like that. Vemon had adjusted to it like this since he and started sleeping in the same bed on his off time. Kaz had never had a partner care this much about his needs, and certainly never had anyone take care of him like this. For him, Kaz barely saw much that wasn't right in front of him anyway, darkness hardly bothered him. Despite his ever disappearing vision, he was still just as painfully sensitive to light. The dark was the only thing he could tolerate without glasses.

He knew Vemon could hardly see this way. He'd fussed over it many times, asking him tirelessly to turn the lights on if he needed it. Telling him about how he was more than fine with wearing sunglasses indoors, if he wasn't, he wouldn't be able to work half the time. Finally, one day, Vemon just responded by taking his hand, giving his fingers a kiss, and telling him about how beautiful his eyes were. How lovely it was to see him without layers upon layers on top of him. How much he loved it when his smile or laughter hit his eyes. Miller has since never asked again.

It made Kaz feel at home. He watched the heavy man pull curtains over windows that already were covered by blinds, going to each one. The domesticity of it all made Kaz's chest ache.

Now, he could just barely see the outline of V's silhouette as he crawled into bed with him, feeling him slide beside him and wrap his arms around him, placing a tender kiss on his cheek. Kaz couldn't help but smile, looking over at him. From here, he could see him unfiltered. He could see the outlines of his rough features, his beard, in desperate need of a shave, and his messy hair. Kaz turned over to rest his head in the crook of his shoulder, burying his face in V's muscles. He was warm, a nice balance to the cool temperature of the room. It didn't take long for Kaz to melt into him, all the tension and worry from his hours of constant work melting as he laid there with Snake, finally in a moment of peace.  
Kaz closed his eyes and listened to the waves hit the struts of the base, an oddly calming rhythm he'd come to search for over the years. That, mixed with the up and down of Vemon's chest against his, began to lull him into sleep.

After a moment, he felt Vemon press another kiss onto the top of his head, lingering for a moment.

"Kaz?" he asked, barely above a whisper.

"Mm," Kaz mumbled in response, already beginning to dream.

"I love you," Vemon spoke as if he'd been waiting to tell him all day. Perhaps he had been. In his exhaustion, Kaz didn't even think. He just felt himself smile into Vemon's neck.

"Love you too."

**Author's Note:**

> this was so self indulgent but hopefully someone other than me will like it asdsdfhghgkl


End file.
